Entry tags:
sometimes, there's a third, even deeper level, and that one's the same as the top. like pie.
Tonight, I think I have determined that, minus S3 bullshittery, Nathan Petrelli is my favorite character of all time.
This is a Big Deal in my trivial fandom life. Anyone who knows me will tell you that while my fandom trends go in and out, once I declare an all-time favorite, it stays that way pretty much forever despite what I might be currently fangirling about. Granted, I claimed Cid and Brock as my all-time favorites back in the day, but I was super-young and impulsive and hadn't been exposed to too much. I STILL LOVE YOU TO DEATH, CID, DON'T TAKE ME WRONG.
But oh god. Nathan. He's so fucking fascinating on so many levels and has so many issues whilst struggling with his own morality – or rather, pretending to struggle with his own morality beneath the bare surface of being a total abrasive asshole (who pretends to be a stand-up kinda guy), because he has to convince himself that his assholery is for a good reason even if he knows deep down that it's completely self-serving, but then it does bother him, because even deeper down, he does care about others, but on a level deeper than that, he mostly cares about others only in relation to himself (a.k.a. needing Peter to need him in order to validate his own existence), but then at his core he is good, because once he does realize how fucked up his actions are, he sacrifices his life to do The Right Thing, and then his guilt issues afterwards all the way up to his tentative recuperation in S2 and THAT'S WHERE THE SHOW ENDS RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT but seriously oh god I could go on about him all day about the insane amount of levels his personality haswhich is why what S3 has done is so fucking unforgiveable. I've always loved characters susceptible to corruption because of their own self-serving intentions, but then who have to desperately justify it to themselves as being for the greater good because they want to see themselves as being good because they see being a good person as an ideal even despite their own skewed morality and sjhdkajshfkashfkajhsfkja oh mannnnnnn so of course Nathan's issues like HIT ME IN ALL THE RIGHT PLACES PLUS his whole exuding total control over his life and general adultness while he's really so incredibly vulnerable and insecure that he allows himself to be manipulated so easily, until, of course, he (sort of) gets over this and decides to become his own man and oh man his plot arc NAAAAAATHANNNSDa
And then on top of all of this he can motherfucking fly. HOW AWESOME OF A CHARACTER IS THIS, GUYS?!? HOW AWESOME IS HE SERIOUSLY SDJHAKDJHAKJDHLKAJHDALDPOIEPRWHA:DLKNA because of course being a pilot or being able to fly or being associated with flight/skies/wings in any way is somehow a big character turn-on for me wtffffff, self. SO YEAH
Anyway, this was all spawned by looking for icons of a show that I can't even bring myself to watch anymore. What the hell, self. What the hell. I have turned fierce and self-righteous denial into an art. ...kind of like Nathan, LULZ
Now after that exceedingly important public service announcement that everyone needs to read, gonna sleep k bye.
Well, also, I want to get working on some old Supernatural fic now since OH GOD THAT EPISODE THIS WEEK? AMAZING. ...Also how appropriate is this song for this entry rite wtf hsfkaashahaha I ADORE BSB SHUT UP
This is a Big Deal in my trivial fandom life. Anyone who knows me will tell you that while my fandom trends go in and out, once I declare an all-time favorite, it stays that way pretty much forever despite what I might be currently fangirling about. Granted, I claimed Cid and Brock as my all-time favorites back in the day, but I was super-young and impulsive and hadn't been exposed to too much. I STILL LOVE YOU TO DEATH, CID, DON'T TAKE ME WRONG.
But oh god. Nathan. He's so fucking fascinating on so many levels and has so many issues whilst struggling with his own morality – or rather, pretending to struggle with his own morality beneath the bare surface of being a total abrasive asshole (who pretends to be a stand-up kinda guy), because he has to convince himself that his assholery is for a good reason even if he knows deep down that it's completely self-serving, but then it does bother him, because even deeper down, he does care about others, but on a level deeper than that, he mostly cares about others only in relation to himself (a.k.a. needing Peter to need him in order to validate his own existence), but then at his core he is good, because once he does realize how fucked up his actions are, he sacrifices his life to do The Right Thing, and then his guilt issues afterwards all the way up to his tentative recuperation in S2 and THAT'S WHERE THE SHOW ENDS RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT but seriously oh god I could go on about him all day about the insane amount of levels his personality has
And then on top of all of this he can motherfucking fly. HOW AWESOME OF A CHARACTER IS THIS, GUYS?!? HOW AWESOME IS HE SERIOUSLY SDJHAKDJHAKJDHLKAJHDALDPOIEPRWHA:DLKNA because of course being a pilot or being able to fly or being associated with flight/skies/wings in any way is somehow a big character turn-on for me wtffffff, self. SO YEAH
Anyway, this was all spawned by looking for icons of a show that I can't even bring myself to watch anymore. What the hell, self. What the hell. I have turned fierce and self-righteous denial into an art. ...kind of like Nathan, LULZ
Now after that exceedingly important public service announcement that everyone needs to read, gonna sleep k bye.
Well, also, I want to get working on some old Supernatural fic now since OH GOD THAT EPISODE THIS WEEK? AMAZING. ...Also how appropriate is this song for this entry rite wtf hsfkaashahaha I ADORE BSB SHUT UP